I had a call today with a serpent. Here’s what happened.
First, this is where I am in the process:
- Call 1: one of the mothers in my life (CW)
- Call 2: source of unconditional love (JB)
- Call 3: after the first two calls, and a few days, I realized that I was ready for something. Unsure what that was, I knew that AM was the person I wanted to speak to next. This article is about Call #3.
The serpent, AM, started the conversation with by sharing a dream they had, “I was a serpant going down into the water to find a pearl of wisdom and coming back up to open my mouth and give it to you. I just continued going around and around to get you the pearls.”
Space
After the initial few minutes of orienting myself to the video call, I sensed power rising up from within AM. This was followed by what feels like having a space held for me. ‘Holding space’ is language learned from DS in 2019. AM invited me into the moment. There I was, sitting in my chair. I looked at the serpant right between the eyes as I opened my receptors and stepped inside.
Perspective
I started the call with a certain memory or identity of AM based on previous experiences with them. Prior to this dynamic awakening (dynamic awakening is language from MG), I didn’t understand the person I was seeing. It was like I had been seeing AM through foggy eye glasses. I couldn’t actually see who they really were. This humbling humility had me feeling more receptive and thirsty. I decided to indulge in my curiousity and satisfy my cravings.
Put the world down.
AM had me visualize the weight of the world (which reminds me of a song shared with me by V in CR this year by Lil Wayne and Eminem – Drop the World) on my shoulders by showing me through physical actions. “Look, can you see how heavy it is up here? Now I can take it off my shoulders, and place it down on the ground right under me and down into my feet. I am rooting it into the ground through myself as the base.”
Intellectual
Pearl after pearl. Wisdom was delivered to me. It was as if the serpent, or, AM, didn’t even need to hear my full sentences before splashing back down in the water to grab the relevant pearl wisdom and back up out of the water to open wide for me to discern whether I wanted to pick it up, or not. The pearls I picked up become electrons as if they are orbiting me (like I am an atom) until I can begin to integrate the pearl into my life at the right time.
Physical
Each pearl was administered through subtle, profound moments facilitated by AM. Engaged by AM’s storytelling, I dropped into a deeper state. As if I went somewhere else. I felt my eyes water as my eyelids got heavy. It felt like life was rushing through my cells (language learned from EE in 2019) for 10-20 seconds. I left my body for those few seconds. This happened 4-5 times on the call.
Listening
I seem to be listening with sharper, more open ears than the past. As if I am in the middle of the desert searching for water. Or, as if I was waiting for the next pearl of wisdom to drop out of AM’s mouth.
Noticing
I noticed AM mentioned the word “shaman” a few times on the call. This had me pick up the pearl of wisdom and place it as an electron that orbits me until I am ready to use it (electrons inspired by JB).
Connecting
I learned a ‘breadcrumb metaphor’ from LL in April of 2020. As I write these words I recall LL telling me they are a shaman. We were on a Zoom call, and they shared an anecdote about how to understand the path of life. The intention of the metaphor that was chosen was to meet me where I was at the moment.
“Think of walking the path of life similar to following a trail of breadcrumbs. You take one step. Look around. Look down to see which breadcrumb you’d like to eat. Step towards the breadcrumb. Pick it up. Eat it. Look around.”
I loved that metaphor. It spoke a language I understood. It provided me with enough of whatever I needed from within to be okay eating one breadcrumb at a time and taking steps forward into the unknown.
I accepted breadcrumbs as a metaphor for taking the path of life because, at the time, breadcrumbs are what I accepted everywhere in my life. Scraps. Anything I could get. I am reminded of BR, “I want to see you take up more space, Daniel.”
I shared the breadcrumbs concept on the call with AM today. The serpant quickly went down into the water to create a moment for me to update my comprehension of what the path can look like. Perhaps it is not breadcrumbs. I would find out soon.
“You know that breadcrumb story? It reminds me of codependence. You can learn more about it through the attachment styles. You are having a feast. There are no more breadcrumbs. Remember, you are sitting on top of the world rooted into the ground. Now you are going to feast.”
I felt myself drop into a deeper state as AM’s words washed over me. Like the words were soaking through the pours of my skin. This brought me to a moment where I needed to make a decision. Will I continue living a life with the world on my shoulders while I eat breadcrumbs and struggle to stay alive? Or, will I drop the world, take a seat at the table, and enjoy the feast?
In this moment – as I type these words – my discernment says that I don’t want breadcrumbs. I don’t deserve breadcrumbs. It’s time for me to feast. This reminds me of RC who hosts dinners for people to feast together. It would be nice to attend another one of those events.
Learn by Doing
AM mentioned shadow work. Now that I am not avoiding the darkness, I asked about the meaning of shadow work. What is it? How can I start it? Am I already doing it? The serpant replied, “The last time I helped someone with shadow work, I told them to tell me what it meant. What does it mean to you? Are you doing it already?”
Facilitators of Magic
I was quickly reminded of something I noticed about this group of visionaries when I first met them over the years: They facilitate moments that invite me to change my understanding of reality. AM is the holder of a very precious medicine that the world needs. Their existence is an act of service.
In Closing
In 2019, I met AM when I was walking into a workshop that was being facilitated by VK at LS in BK.
As I walked in the entrance of the space, it seemed as if they were about to start the workshop. A lot of people were there. AM stood at the entrance wearing a yellow dress. AM was there to greet me as I crossed the threshold into the sacred space. AM was there to make sure I got in and was accounted for.
Beginning Disguised as an Ending
Here we are. Two years later. Everyone seems to be here. They are about to start something. AM is giving me the pearls I may need on this journey, and, again, is here greeting me – welcoming me – making sure I am accounted for – walking with me as I cross the next threshold.
— Daniel D.