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I want to fall in love for the last time

I just paid $58 for Match.com and here is the essay I wrote for my bio.

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I have officially graduated from Tinder. Movin’ on up with my $58 Match.com membership.

I want to meet someone who wants to have fun and enjoy this thing called life.

I want to spend time with a person who has a big heart.

I would like to meet a woman I can spend the rest of my life with. I want to have so much fun with her. SO much.

I want the companionship. I want a best friend for life. I want to watch movies together. I want to cook for us. I want us to be independent and even more powerful with one another’s support.

I want to surprise you with mix tapes aka Spotify playlists. I wouldn’t mind a playlist here and there as well!

I want to sit on the couch and just hang out together – talk about our day – talk about what’s going on in our lives – no TV or distractions – just us (I don’t mean 24/7 super-intense weirdness – I just think making time for those moments is how people go deeper into the relationship together).

I want someone to talk about my future with. I want someone who wants my advice about her future. I want to make group decisions about the future we make together. Children? That is a group decision.

I hope this rant of mine doesn’t seem too much like a checklist. It is who I am. It is all the things I have sacrificed in past relationships because sometimes it seems like so much work to start all over with someone new. But, why do we have to sacrifice the things that are important to us? For me, I end up having sacrifice those things because they slowly uncover themselves throughout the course of getting to know someone. After a few months of exclusivity there are usually quite a few things we learn about one another – things that if we had known about all of them on the first few dates we probably would have moved on. Once we start growing together it gets difficult to move on. The thought of first dates, finding the dates, the early conversations which seem so empty, and then somehow making it through the haystack of “matches” to hopefully find the needle again.

I am hoping that by being as descriptive as possible here it will remove the haystack conundrum. This should shed light on who I am, the emotional and intimate investment I bring to the table, and the type of relationship I am interested in cultivating.

This description may seem unrealistically idealistic. However, I think it is something we all deserve to indulge in. It is not always going to be a thrilling romance novel, rom-com, or one of those “secret books” my mom always reads in private. I am prepared to work through the parts I do not like so we can get to the parts we love.

I am imperfect. The relationship will be imperfect. Perhaps that is what will make it perfect.

BY THE WAY: I just moved to Washington, D.C. on June 16th – I previously lived in New Jersey.

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